It's CRAPTASTIC!

I hate when moms cry. Especially when you're mom is the one crying. Makes you feel like crap.
The crap is still quite fresh and it's freaking craptastic. I hate when moms cry as they argue with you. I hate arguing. She sat at the foot of my bad, and I turned away, my back to her as I stared at the wall. I felt so heartless and cold - who does that? Who doesn't give a damn when they're mom is crying and begging? I thought, "I'm a terrible person," after she left. She asked questions in her high-pitched, trying-not-to-cry voice, and I answered in short spurts, in sarcasm, in indifference, in defence. I thought, "This is not me," and yet I didn't even care. I didn't even apologize. Apologies will come when this is all over. Apologies for her anger and for my stupidity and blind walk into a place in the mind she wishes I wouldn't go. She just doesn't understand. And this is far from over. She wishes it was over, tried so hard for it to be over, but only I can call it off and that scares her something terrible. She can't do anything to save the situation, to reverse time, to mend things, things she can't fix, and for that I am sorry. I'm not sure when this will be done - don't really care at the moment - but I'm sure it'll end in some sort of big bang or another...