We Will Never Foret The Yogurt Crisis of '07
O man, So I guess I can't really make fun of those people in Costco, because I found myself in a dire situation also. No lie, I went off my rocker - I ran out of a certain something and was completely beside myself. It was sad. My Mom was like, "Uh, B, there's a freakin' blizzard - you're out of luck for now," and then she kept looking at me all funny.
I entertained my pathetic self by playing the magic fridge game. You should try this, or perhaps you already have! This is how it works: You go into your kitchen, you cross your fingers and hope there'll be something good in it. Then you open the fridge and see if the magic's happened yet. Then, because you're a crappy magician, you will go to your next show and cross your fingers and open the freezer, say abra-cadabrah a few times. There's nothing there either. Then you head over to your last trick: the pantry. Repeat steps. Go back to fridge to try your magic once again. You might have thought I'd lost an arm, the way I was carrying on. Nope, just yogurt. All out of yogurt 'cause someone forgot to pick it up the day before. I'll get you back, evil-doer - karma's a bitch! Muah ha ha ha! Anyway, back to my mania. I was soooo desperate. You could have chopped off my head and I wouldn't have cared as much - partly because I'd be dead, which is much preferred over a shortage of Silhouette Yogurt Smoothies any day of the week. I'm pretty sure I completely weirded out my family. That's always good. I could have licked out the recycling bin, for pete's sake. That's sad. And grotesque (shudders). Only, I only thought of this possibility afterward, when I'd already replenished my supply, and so it became less appealing. Ha ha this is messed, but I NEEDED MY FREAKING YOGURT, OK?! I doubt I will remember the "The Blizzard of '07," - I will remember "The Yogurt Crisis of '07." May it never happen again. If I ever win the lottery, I think, besides paying for my education and buying my own house, I will buy the entire Danone yogurt company to ensure I never run out again and actually contemplate licking out the recycling bin. Ha ha ha; seriously though - I will buy yogurt. I'd hate to have history repeat itself - that would be the real tragedy.
Buh bye from the Obsessive-Compulsive Unit.
I entertained my pathetic self by playing the magic fridge game. You should try this, or perhaps you already have! This is how it works: You go into your kitchen, you cross your fingers and hope there'll be something good in it. Then you open the fridge and see if the magic's happened yet. Then, because you're a crappy magician, you will go to your next show and cross your fingers and open the freezer, say abra-cadabrah a few times. There's nothing there either. Then you head over to your last trick: the pantry. Repeat steps. Go back to fridge to try your magic once again. You might have thought I'd lost an arm, the way I was carrying on. Nope, just yogurt. All out of yogurt 'cause someone forgot to pick it up the day before. I'll get you back, evil-doer - karma's a bitch! Muah ha ha ha! Anyway, back to my mania. I was soooo desperate. You could have chopped off my head and I wouldn't have cared as much - partly because I'd be dead, which is much preferred over a shortage of Silhouette Yogurt Smoothies any day of the week. I'm pretty sure I completely weirded out my family. That's always good. I could have licked out the recycling bin, for pete's sake. That's sad. And grotesque (shudders). Only, I only thought of this possibility afterward, when I'd already replenished my supply, and so it became less appealing. Ha ha this is messed, but I NEEDED MY FREAKING YOGURT, OK?! I doubt I will remember the "The Blizzard of '07," - I will remember "The Yogurt Crisis of '07." May it never happen again. If I ever win the lottery, I think, besides paying for my education and buying my own house, I will buy the entire Danone yogurt company to ensure I never run out again and actually contemplate licking out the recycling bin. Ha ha ha; seriously though - I will buy yogurt. I'd hate to have history repeat itself - that would be the real tragedy.
Buh bye from the Obsessive-Compulsive Unit.
posted by Breanne at 9:15 PM
1 Comments:
yes yes, I know I spelled "Forget" wrong - for an OCD kid, you'd think I'd check my spelling, right?
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